Sunday, December 25, 2011

Another Wonderful Christmas Gift

A couple of years ago, my one son gave me a wonderful gift- 'The Santa Stimulus Package', an original comic that he wrote and illustrated.
This year, he gave me another original creation:

'How the Legal System Stole Christmas'
by H. Dahmm

Chapter 1

Although he lived in a region where temperatures never reached above freezing, Santa had never felt this cold in all his life. He waddled wearily around the small enclosure, surveying its modest furniture. Against the far wall sat an industrial steel bedframe, which held a deplorably thin mattress that could never support his weight. In the opposite corner, there was a metallic toilet, which was caked in rust. Outside the room’s one window, snow was falling. Between the snow and Santa, though, stood a series of vertical, iron bars.

As inconceivable as it seemed, The United States government had placed Santa on their “naughty” list and had locked him in a penitentiary accordingly. The evening had begun as all Christmas eve nights had begun before. Along with a warm hug, Mrs. Claus had given Santa a thermos of hot cocoa and a laxative (all of the cookies had to go somewhere) and then sent him on his way. Following a salute to his faithful elves, Santa boarded a super jet laden with toys.

Although much of the general public was under the impression that Santa preferred to travel by Reindeer, he had found this mode of transportation to be rather problematic. After Rudolf had experienced an unfortunate run-in with an electric cable, Santa had made the executive decision to transition over to a more conventional form of flight. The plane was secured by armored walls and some twenty chubby elves armed with high powered rifles, which they could barely lift, let alone fire. These safety measures seemed absurd, but the aircraft’s cargo was enough to fill 58 Wal-Marts.

When the jet reached the eastern coast of the United States, Santa and his elves, one by one, began to parachute from the rear of the plane. With packaged gifts in their arms, they gradually descended through the cloudy night, landing on the roofs of nearby houses. The impact with asphalt shingles was unpleasant, and muttered curses of “wrap it!” and “oh gingerbread!” filled the air. Once at their assigned destinations, Santa and his elves tossed some presents under the Christmas tree, took the liberty of “examining” the refrigerator, and made a pit stop by the bathroom. Additionally, Santa snapped a few photographs at every house he visited. These images were intended for his decidedly disturbing blog, titled “I See You When You’re Sleeping”.

As soon as this work was done, Santa and his elves climbed their respective chimneys and loaded onto the hovering jet by launching candy cane grappling hooks that connected with the underbelly of the airplane. Once they had all returned to the ship, the elves, and especially Santa, celebrated a successful round of deliveries with a healthy serving of spiked eggnog.

This process was then repeated hundreds of thousands of times across the country. By the time the team reached California, mistakes began to arise. Due to exhaustion, Santa would on occasion give a young boy a doll house or a ten year old a collection of Spot books, but this night he had made an error of unprecedented magnitude…

What was Santa’s big mistake? What has NORAD really been up to all these years? Is Santa a jolly fat man or a predator?

Find the answers in the next edition of

'How the Legal System Stole Christmas'

I can't wait for Chapter 2!

Saturday, December 24, 2011


Happy Holidays!
Best wishes for a creative New Year!

Wednesday, December 21, 2011

A Real Page Turner

In recent years I have become a huge fan of audio books. When I get in my car, I usually have a book to listen to. I'll have one book going for driving and one book going for studio time. There are few and precious moments when I can actually sit to read a book, but when I do, I definitely prefer an actual book.
I have yet to be tempted by the various forms of e-readers.
I love having the actual printed text in my hands and the actual book on one of my bookshelves.
So old fashioned of me!
Appealing to those other old fashioned readers, I recently made some bookmarks.
These sweet bookmarks have bits of text that I cut out of one of my old, old dictionaries.
The text was then protected with a two part epoxy resin.
I am completely delighted with these bookmarks which came about when a friend asked, "Say, do you make bookmarks?"
I thought of the cardstock bookmarks that our local library gives out, and used that size as inspiration for my design.
Pieces of copper, brass and German silver were cut, filed and sanded. I then textured the surfaces with various hammers and steel stamps.
A selection of quotes were hand stamped onto small pieces of brass which were then riveted to the bases.
A hole was cut in to top of each bookmark for threading a piece of leather.
Bookmarking an e-reader is simply not as fun as having an actual bookmark.

Monday, December 19, 2011

Other Interests

For years I had thought about trying my hand at painting, but always had a reason not to follow though....too busy with an abundance of commitments and a deep seeded fear that I would really stink.
Earlier this year I thought "What am I waiting for?"

It is quite a struggle for me, but working in the 2 dimensional arena does not scare me as much as it used to.